Writing Workshop Discussion: Show, Don't Tell
1) What direct mode of characterization (appearance, dialogue, action, or thought) is most likely to lead to telling? Which is most likely to lead to showing?
As most people aren’t mind readers, thought leads to telling. The reader may be able to discern something of the character’s thoughts through their actions, however, “Eyes wide, the ranger, fumbling for her sidearm, backs away from the angry bear.”
Describing what the senses are discerning leads to showing. Consider the following examples, “John drunkenly hails passing cabs,” compared to, “John, smelling of urine and beer, swaying gently, mumbles, ‘takee,’ to passing cabs.” Burroway stated that “A detail is ‘definite,’ and ‘concrete,’ when it appeals to the senses” (23).
2) Some writers and teachers have recently suggested that the advice of “Show Don’t Tell” can be problematic advice. Why do you think that is? (ideas/hints: it has to do with modes of characterization and what it means to tell on a technical level. If we are told to only SHOW our characters, what could we be missing out on?)
Thought doesn’t lend itself to showing. If we only showed our characters, we would miss out on their internal monologues.
Also, there are times when “some parts of your narrative will inevitably be more effectively told than shown; some periods of action want to passed over with the speed of summary” (Burroway 30). If it feels like your story is getting bogged down, maybe telling would speed things up.
3) Finally, give your own advice on how to immerse a reader into a fictional world. If we were to rewrite “Show Don’t Tell” what is some advice that is just as or more helpful? For example, my way of showing this is: writers must connect directly to the heads, hearts, sensations, and bodies of our point of view characters. We also should consciously mix modes of characterization. (This is not as simple as SHOW DON’T TELL; it's more about mixing the ways in which we present characters.) What’s your own version of this? Or, helpful advice from someone else that's helped you show a story?
I think, as readers want to be immersed, half of the work is done for the writer. What writers need to be cognizant of is avoiding things that break immersion. I call them speed bumps. Burroway observes that “spelling grammar, paragraphing, and punctuation are a kind of magic; their purpose is to be invisible” (41). I would add word choice to Burroway’s list. Consider both your target audience’s and characters' vocabularies when choosing words. I suggest using the simplest word that gets the job done. Consider, “The wending lines of snow and irregular sheets of verglas played with the sunlight in ripples and waves,” (Sean & Craig Davis Heaven’s Gate). Maybe your target audience knows the meaning of verglas, but wouldn’t, “The wending lines of snow and irregular sheets of ice played with the sunlight in ripples and waves,” convey the writer’s meaning just as well?